14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
“Paxton, Stop acting like a baby. Stop talking like a baby, you aren’t a baby.” I scolded my almost three-year-old. In the past few weeks, Paxton had taken on all the characteristics of his younger baby brother. In Paxton’s jealousy of his brother, he proceeded to crawl and cry to be held; he even started saying, “ma-ma” like it was his first time. Exhausted, I’d been watching for triggers. I looked everywhere for what might be causing his issues. Eventually, I noticed that every time I praised Barkley, made Barkley laugh, or picked Barkley up, Paxton was by my side trying to get attention.
Exhausted with his regression, I became frustrated. Even when I praised him for all the cool things he did, it didn’t seem to sink in. Why didn’t Paxton receive my praise? Couldn’t he see that it wasn’t a matter of his brother or him being better? That the two of them were just different and equally loved?
Exasperated, I began to feel convicted. You see, I had been doing the same thing. I had been comparing my own journey to someone else.
I was also saying, “What about me?” while looking at someone else. I was trying to emulate a story that wasn’t my own. How many times had I wished to be or have what belonged to someone else? God’s desire was for me to live in the position he gave me.
Not to operate within the unique capacity and gifting that God has given me is a direct insult to my maker. Introverted? That’s how God made you. Extroverted? That’s how God made you. Singer? Yes, use that talent. Giving? Operate in his gifting. Service oriented? More power to you. Praise him for the unique gifting that you have because there’s only ONE you. It benefits the kingdom when you are YOU. “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well” (Psalm 139:14).